Forgiveness

How the fuck do people do it? Forgive.
I don't mean for little shit, that's easy. The reasons to forgive little offenses are extensive: Life is too short, no one's perfect, let ye who is without guilt cast the first stone, etc.
What I don't understand is how forgiveness can prevail when there is deep pain involved--emotional or physical. The tendency seems to be superficial forgiveness, when at the core pain and fear remain. Pain from allowing ourselves to be vulnerable in the first place, and the fear of the future.
Maybe we choose to be unhappy, and the power of NOT forgiving is a way for us to hurt ourselves indefinitely...like a wound we can reanimate whenever we want.
The past is a strange thing. According to quantum physics, our brains cannot tell the difference between something it remembers and something it is experiencing in real time. That makes sense to me, because painful things in my past cause real time pain when I think of them. The question is, why do we think about the fucking past? The past is not a reality. Our perception of what WAS is never exactly the same as how others remember what WAS. Therefore it is not something tangible.
Of course when things are recorded with audio/visual equipment and retransmitted we believe we understand what happened in the past. Does that make the actual events from the past real, though? Does that make pain and fear more justifiable?
Lately my dreams have been loosely tied to events from my past--like an alternate present that is heavily influenced by pain from my past. Waking from these dreams is difficult. I find myself reminiscing on painful memories for days, and this is the motivation for my current web logging.
Truth be told, I don't enjoy pain.

Recording has begun

Well, the recording has begun. I am very excited to undertake this undertaking...
We are hoping to finish everything by the fall, and hoping all the elements will come into manifestation by then. There are many bases to cover, and the initial tracking of the songs is about step 3 in a 12-step process.
I will post more as time permits and things develop. The rough tracks we brought home are the first studio recordings we have since the Sweet Inside single came out. It is a creative and busy time for Kristen, Ryan, Dan and myself. We'll see how things go, eh? Hope is the fuel for this project. We are by no means in a financial situation that allows a professional recording project to succeed. Everything we are doing is grass-roots, contributions from individuals that either love us or have an integral, artistic input. We have more tracking to do, and I will be adding photos as they get edited and uploaded. Thanks for reading.

As the music turns

The band has scheduled the first block of recording sessions at
Wave Lab starting May 2. Hard to believe it was 2 years ago
when the debut CD came out, and we've had a tough time
deciding which new songs should go on the album. Kristen and
I were shocked to look at all the material we've written in that
time. We're working on the arrangements and working out
some ideas, trying out different sounds/instruments, writing
harmonies and experimenting with rhythms and tempos. We've
played a lot of these songs live--usually by the seat of our pants.
"Pardon me Mick...but have you seen the root of the chord?" I
know that life is busy for everyone, and with the media saying
that the economy will never recover, but music perseveres all
things does it not? Kristen has written some beautiful music
and we can't wait to share it with all of you. (I'm pretty
impressed with the musical aspect myself.) It's late now so I'll be
shoving off. See ya, and thanks for reading.

Music VS Math

The public school system in Tucson, AZ is about to cut music in junior high. The importance of music in life should be obvious. The importance of music in the development of children cannot be denied. How can we prioritize otherwise?

Every civilization that abandons the arts for global dominance has fallen under its own weight. People are being taught to add but not sing. How is this going to help our world? What are the long-term effects of cutting music from our schools? Why do I feel like the older I get the less decision-making power I actually have?

Like John Mayer sang "I just found out there's no such thing as the 'real world', just a lie you have to rise above."

I suppose I am fighting the gradual destruction of the arts by teaching guitar, piano and percussion privately.

It is unfortunate that I feel powerless against something as celestial as a school district. It is unfortunate that I have lost faith in my tax dollars working for the community. It is unfortunate that we parents must find alternative ways to enforce the truly beautiful things in life.

Who has time?

I am out of time. My days are filled. I have a digital calendar that keeps my schedule straight...and when I look at that screen filled with color-coordinated to-dos I can't help but feel nostalgic for my younger days--like when I was 20.

When I was 20 years old I had no television set, no cell phone, no computer. I lived alone in a state where I had no relatives. I was smoking copious amounts of marijuana and expanding my horizons with psychedelics. I worked at shitty jobs that earned me enough money to pay for shitty apartments, and once a year I would drive half-way across the country to visit my parents and friends that were "back home".

Life was simple, relatively speaking. I have memories of entire days where I had not a single obligation. The only decision-making I needed to put forth was regarding lunch entrees and public park destinations. My time was mine to spend.

Welcome

This is an experiment in narcissism. If you wish to leave a comment feel free. I know I would...